Free
by coffeechick87
Summary: In a future where nothing is the same, can Rory ‘Lorelai Leigh’ Gilmore find the strength to go home again? And back to the man that she left behind? [AU] [Lit.] [Prologue – Ch. 4]
1. Prologue

So, at long last I'm back with another Lit. I believe that this might be one of the best things that I've ever written thus far (although you won't be able to tell until the first chapter). I like it, and all that I can do is hope that you do too.  
  
This fic is what I like to call 'Rory-centric', it's a Lit, but most of the time it revolves around Rory and what her life is...or had been, rather. You'll understand what I mean in due time.  
  
Now, I'm going to do all the obligatory things (i.e.: _I disclaim!!..._ _**dusts off hands**,_ I think I took care of that.)  
  
And, this is Pg-13 right now. I don't really see it going to R, but there's always a possibility, although a very slim one, that it might.  
  
The fic isn't a song-fic per-se, but it was inspired by the song below, and it's also where I got the title.

I'd like to tank **_Sami_**,****who beta'd this chapter for me, You rock, hun!  
  
So, now I'm going to shut up, and let you read. I hope you enjoy the Prologue to my new baby.  
  
Jayde.

* * *

** Free** ****

********

**_And I watched you leaving  
A silhouette of all the time we shared  
And there's no reason  
For you to turn around and come back here  
I guess I knew that  
You'd grow up to be the woman that you are  
Now that you're leaving   
I never thought the day would come so soon  
  
But you gotta be free  
To walk down the path of uncertainty  
You've got to believe yeah  
That you're gonna make it yeah  
You gotta be free  
To take the chances that you need to take  
You've got to believe_**

**_That you're gonna make it yeah  
  
I thought I saw you  
Smiling at me from a billboard sign  
I guess I'm looking  
Just a little too hard  
And I thought I heard you  
Singing to me from the Broadway stage  
And you were a queen that  
Finally found her start  
  
I can't deny that you're a dreamer  
I watch you spread your wings to fly away forever  
when you said goodbye I knew  
  
you gotta be free  
to walk down the path of uncertainty  
you've got to believe yeah  
that you're gonna make it yeah  
You gotta be free  
To take the chances that you need to take  
You've gotta believe_**

**_That you're gonna make it yeah  
  
I still remember when I  
Looked Into your baby blue eyes  
I remember thinking that you could be  
What you want to be  
Thanks for all your help dad  
I understand why you're so sad  
But there's a world out there for me   
So I must be on my way  
  
And you gotta be free  
To walk down the path of uncertainty  
You've got to believe  
That you're gonna make it, yeah_**

**_You've got to be free  
and I hope you're still believing  
'Cause I know  
that you're gonna make It yeah  
  
and I watched you leaving  
that you just got to be free yeah_**

****

**Free, Brad Johner**

****

****

**Prologue:** **One Day**

**_2007 _**

".... Paris Eustace Gellar, Double Major in Journalism and English.... Amanda Jane Gibbs, Majoring in Child Psychology.... Lorelai Leigh Gilmore, Double Major in Journalism and Theater.... Jonathan Markus Griffith, Majoring in Early American History...." The speaker droned on as more students ascended the podium and received their diplomas...

**_2008_**

"Jess! Oh my God! You wouldn't believe who called me today!"  
  
Jess Mariano looked over at his long time girlfriend perched on the end of the bed, her smile taking over her face, and her eyes bright with excitement. He set his papers beside him and looked at her. "Who called?"  
  
"Pat." She grinned even larger as she said his name.  
  
"Your agent, Pat?"  
  
She nodded excitedly, her hair flowing wildly around her face. "Yes. He called, and do you remember the commercial that I made a month ago?" At his nod, she eagerly continued, "Well, apparently one of the big-wigs in a major casting company saw it when he was trying to find an actress to play a supporting role in the new Russell Crowe movie, and, well, he got in touch with the company that I did the commercial for, who, in turn gave him Pat's number." Her voice trailed off, as if waiting for a reaction.  
  
Jess was speechless. He honestly had no clue what to say. "That's...." Clearing his throat, he tried again, "That's amazing! I'm so happy for you. So what happens, you go to their office to audition?"  
  
"No, actually, Pat sent some of my other stuff to him, and he showed them to the producers, and the part's mine, if I want it." She smiled, her eyes sparkling. "And Pat e-mailed the script to me, I read over it, and.... Jess, the role is absolutely amazing. I'd be playing Sissy Spacek's daughter, for God's sake! She is one of the most amazing actresses in the business!"  
  
"Wow... so, what are you going to do?"  
  
"I want to do it. But... I'm still not sure if being an actress is the right thing, ya' know? I'm a journalist, and I'm a damn good journalist! But acting. That isn't a stable occupation. So... I'm still not sure if acting is what I really want to do. Do you know what I mean?"  
  
"Yes, I do." Jess opened his arms, and she snuggled into them.  
  
"I have until Sunday to decide, because filming starts soon, and the producers and everybody else want a table reading, some rehearsal time, and time to let the actors get to know one another, and since it's Friday today...." She shook her head and buried herself deeper into his embrace. "So how was your day?" She mumbled into his chest.  
  
"Good, actually. I got offered a position teaching English at a high school."  
  
"Really?" She sat up and looked at him, smiling. "That's great! Where?"  
  
"Well, funny thing, actually...you know, there's this small town in Connecticut. Really odd people, and a grumpy guy that owns the diner there—"  
  
"No way!" She laughed. "You got offered a job at SHH? So what did you say?"  
  
"I have to have an answer by Monday. So I can think over the weekend."  
  
"You should say yes." She closed her eyes for a moment, and nodded into his chest. Then she smiled.  
  
"What?" He asked, feeling the curve of her mouth against his skin.  
  
"Us."  
  
"What about us?" He questioned.  
  
"Just us. Back in Stars Hollow. Back where everything began. I think that it's a bit ironic that we've gone full circle."  
  
"I guess...." Jess trailed off, his hand stroking her hair. "But what happens if you decide to take the role?"  
  
She sat up a bit, "I don't think that I will. I mean, I think that the only way that I would do it is if you came with me to LA, because I don't think that I'd stay sane without you there. I think that it'll be better if we just move back home. And I got a job offer from the Hartford Chronicle which I was seriously considering, so...."  
  
Jess looked down at the woman in his arms, amazed at what he had just heard. "You could be turning down a chance of a lifetime! How can you say no to it?"  
  
She scrambled out of his arms, shocked by the vehemence of his statement. "How can I say no? Jess, how can I say yes? You'd be on the other side of the country, for God's sakes!"  
  
"I won't let you throw away your dream just so you can be with me! I'm not that selfish!"  
  
"I wouldn't be throwing away my dream! I'd be fulfilling one of my other dreams! And I'd be with you! How can you say that I'd be throwing my dream away?"  
  
"Because...the rest of your life, you'd always wonder. 'What would my life have been like if I had taken that job?' And you'd probably watch the movie that you were supposed to be in, and follow the career of the actress that could have been you, and think 'if only...'. You know that it's true."  
  
She was silent for a moment, letting the truth of his words seep into her soul. Almost reluctantly, she nodded. "Okay, so I would always wonder, but...." She trailed off as she stood up and started to pace, her bare feet sinking into the plush carpet. "I love you," she said as her eyes misted.  
  
"And I love you. Which is exactly why I want you to say yes. I don't want you looking back a few years from now and hating me because I held you back." He pulled her down to sit beside him on the end of the bed, taking her hands in his, and looking her in the eyes. "And I'll always be here for you. Wherever you are, whatever happens, I'll always love you."  
  
She nodded, "So, what happens to us? Because I don't think that I can do the long-distance thing with you. I mean, being with you but not actually being _with you_...that would be pure hell. I don't think that I could do it." She shook her head sorrowfully, her eyes misty yet again.  
  
"Truthfully, neither do I," Jess replied as he brought one hand up to her face to catch the single tear that was rolling down her cheek.  
  
She sniffed, and regained her composure a little bit. "So, what do we do? Do we...break up?" She voiced the thing that they both knew was coming, but neither of them actually wanted to put into words.  
  
"No, but we... go on a break. We know that we love each other, but everything is screwed up right now, so we are temporarily not together. Does that make sense to you?"  
  
She nodded. "So... I'll call Pat in the morning, then?"  
  
Jess nodded in return. "And I'll call the principal."  
  
"Good." She looked at him again. "Jess? We still have tonight."  
  
Looking at her, he smiled softly as he pulled her into his arms, and raised her mouth to his. Just before he brought his lips down to hers, he murmured, "That we do."

* * *

He stood in the room where they had made love that night almost a week before, and he sighed. Right now she was on a plane, headed for the opposite side of the country, and he was finishing his packing so he could move back to the town where he had re-started his life less than a decade ago. Bending down, he rummaged underneath the bed for a moment, feeling the underside of the bed frame. Sighing when he had what he had been looking for firmly in his hands, he sat on the bare mattress.  
  
Closing his eyes tightly, he squeezed the small velvet box that was in his hand, almost as if he were wishing it away even as he was holding on to it for dear life. Sighing again, he opened his eyes, and then slowly opened the box. Seeing the diamond that was framed by a sapphire on either side, he smiled sadly.  
  
He had been planning to propose the night that they had decided to 'take a break'. Hell, he'd carted the ring around for over a year. At first he had planned to ask her to be his wife the day that she graduated University, then when she got her first job, and then on their fifth anniversary. He had never really gotten the guts to actually do it.  
  
He looked at the ring again, and then out the window, at the sky, where he knew she was, somewhere.  
  
"One day, Rory Gilmore," he murmured. "One day." 

* * *

_So?  
  
_J.


	2. Home

Thank all (3) of you for the wonderful reviews. I'm glad that you liked it.  
  
Since I didn't do a dedication or anything yet, this is my chance. So, I hereby dedicate this fic to all of the Lits (listed, or not) at **stars-hollow.org** for just being so amazing. I love you all.  
  
And I just have to say this before you read: This chapter is unlike anything that I have ever written before, and I think that I like writing like this so this will hopefully be the feeling of the rest of the fic. I figured out that I really do like angst. lol  
  
Enjoy.  
  
-J.

* * *

**Chapter 1: Home**

Rory sighed as she pulled her nondescript silver car up to the driveway that had once been familiar to her. Looking at the dark house, she shook her head and chewed on her bottom lip, a nervous habit that she had adopted from one of her previous characters and never actually let go.  
  
She looked around at the small part of the town that she could see from her cocoon. The white snow that covered every surface, the bright pink of Babette's house...she could even make out the tip of a bright red clay hat poking through the snow at the front of her old neighbor's steps. The place looked as if it had stopped years before—like the earth had stopped spinning, and the town had been suspended in time. Everything that she had seen so far was the exact same as what she had left behind five years ago.  
  
She sighed as she looked back at her old home, the large porch that she had played on as a young girl and the window that she had looked out of dreamily as a teenager. Seeing the house that had once been her home brought sadness into her heart. She knew that when she walked in the door, the family there would stop and stare at her, as if she were a stranger. The long lost daughter and sister whose only contact would be a weekly phone call and a bimonthly invitation to visit—an offer that had never been accepted.  
  
She hadn't wanted her relationship with her family to be so stilted, but through the passing of time, and distance, it seemed to stop being the fun, carefree, I-know-everything-about-you connection that she and her mother had had throughout her teenage and earlier years. It had turned into one of a distant relation, or a recent acquaintance. She had become a stranger in her mother's life.  
  
She knew that her mother had hoarded anything and everything about her, whether it be true or false. The name 'Lorelai Leigh' tended to pop up in many gossip magazines and in the remote back pages of respected publications such as 'People' and 'Vogue', the glossy pages either flinging about untruths, or just subtly shifting facts to suit their own purposes.  
  
They used to call each other on the phone whenever they read something about her, laughing away the miles between them, and do nothing but rack up a very impressive phone bill. That was the way it had been. The way it had been before fame came calling and phone tag seemed to be normal. Before one thing or another came up every time that they said there would be a weekend visit, or a well deserved weeklong vacation. Before the other became an afterthought.  
  
The last time that they had seen each other had been over a year ago, at the wedding. Luke and Lorelai, finally together. She hadn't been witness to the awkward courtship, hadn't been privy to the tiniest details of the first date, the first kiss. She found out about her mother's impending marriage not by an excited phone call, but by a small invitation that had been tucked in with a box of fan mail that she had received. Discovering the card the day that the flowing font carefully picked by her mother had informed the holder to RSVP by, she had actually hesitated about going.  
  
In the end, she had taken a day off, and flown to her old hometown where she had stood quietly in the back, unnoticed by most. She had briefly stopped at the reception and given her mother and new stepfather her congratulations and a kiss on the cheek, on her way back to the airport. Her wedding present to them: tickets to Ireland. Something that she had discussed with her mother when she had been younger, and strangely had never forgotten.  
  
She never knew if they actually went on the trip, one that would find them in a small B&B in an even smaller town that had been a backdrop to one of her movies. She had wondered if they had gone, and stayed in the same room that she did when she had been there. She wondered if her mother knew the significance of the gift itself, the two roundtrip tickets and travel plans in her mind practically screaming 'I haven't forgotten everything'. She wasn't sure if she really wanted to know.  
  
Only months ago, she had received a letter from Luke, telling her that she now had a baby brother. She hadn't even known that Lorelai was pregnant. The phone calls that they shared tended to be short, and awkward. Never delving deeper than 'how was your day' and 'fine', and then switching the roles, and ending with the same result. She could have been hit by a car, and the answer at the end of the day would still be 'fine'.  
  
Blowing out a breath, Rory shut her eyes, hoping against hope that the memories would fade in the self-imposed darkness. Reaching blindly into the purse beside her, she pulled out the slim package of cigarettes that lay inside, hurriedly taking one out, and then returning her hand into her purse in search for a lighter. Swearing, she opened her eyes, and brought the purse into her lap, turning the small overhead light on at the same time.  
  
Finding the silver and enamel lighter, a gift from one of the many directors that she had worked with over the years, at the bottom of one of the designer bag's many pockets, she finally lit the tip, and inhaled the acrid smoke that still burned the back of her throat, even after over a year of regular use. The tension seemed to flow from her, and she took the cigarette from her lips, and exhaled, the bluish gray smoke curling upwards.  
  
Licking her lips, she could taste the menthol of the filter on them. When she had had to play a chain-smoker in a film, she had foolishly though that if the cigarette were minty, she'd be able to get used to it faster. Even after the film wrapped, the craving for that taste, that sharp bite into her lungs, hadn't stopped. So, she bowed to the desire, and promised herself that she'd only have one more, and that every one that she had after that would be her last. That had been eleven months ago.  
  
She frowned suddenly, and violently stabbed out the almost full cigarette, remembering words that her mother had said to her long ago. Something about 'nobody that stays in my house can smell like an ashtray'. Looking back at the house, she knew that she would have to quit if she wanted to stay, especially with the new baby, and that only hardened her resolve to quit smoking.  
  
Sighing again, she focused on the digital clock on her dashboard. 2:46 am. Looking back at the dark house that had one been her home, and now hopefully served as her refuge, she knew without a doubt that all of the inhabitants would be sleeping, like any sane person would be at that time.  
  
Taking her keys out of the ignition, she leaned back and grabbed her always present 'one night' bag that she used as her carry-on and kept behind the seat of her car just in case she was stranded with no luggage at an airport, or lost in an unfamiliar city. With the bag in her lap, she took one more breath of the warm air of the car before she put her purse over her shoulder and opened the car door.  
  
The cold immediately bit into the exposed flesh of her face, putting more natural color into it than had been there in months. Stepping out of the car, she closed the door as quietly as she could, as to not disturb the pristine silence. Pressing the automatic lock button on her keys, she heard the familiar bleep, and started to walk, her designer boots sinking into the crisp snow with every step. Finally making it to the steps, and then onto the porch, Rory walked up to the door that she once felt free to open and close at whim, and hesitated.  
  
She knew that if she opened that door she would be back in the secure fold of her family. She knew that that was what she needed, but she was still wary of going back into now unfamiliar territory. Taking one more deep breath, she savored the sting of the cold air as it filled her lungs, and then slowly turned the door handle. It opened easily under her hand, a thing she wasn't sure if she was relieved at or not.  
  
Walking softly into the entrance, she shut the door behind her, still being sure to be as silent as she could. What she could see in the dark was almost identical to what she would see every time she walked into the door over five years ago. The familiarity of it caused tears to flood her eyes, and she had to bite her lip to prevent the sob that was caught in her throat from surfacing.  
  
After taking a moment to regain her composure, Rory continued into the house, turning herself into the kitchen that looked the same as it had years before, if you didn't count the various baby products that were sitting on the table, and all of the baby-safe covers that covered every hard edge in sight. Turning to face the door of her old room, she didn't know what to expect when she opened the door. She reasoned in her head that they had probably converted it into a guest room long ago, or they were using it for storage. She hoped that there was still a bed in there as she reached for the knob, because the energy that she had stored in her was rapidly depleting.  
  
Whatever she was expecting, it definitely wasn't what she got. Instead of the many boxes of storage, or the unfamiliar colors of a guest room, she was confronted with the past. The room that she had left behind all those years ago at first glance hadn't been changed. As she stepped in, she looked at what she could see through the moon that was shining through the sheer curtains that she herself had chosen when she had been seventeen. Eleven years ago.  
  
She noticed that the things hung on the walls were mostly still there, but for one wall. The wall that had been home to the entire Harvard gift shop, and then the Yale one, had been changed. No more did it hold the dreams of a high school girl; now it held the past of a woman. Publicity photos, movie posters, and a few select pictures from award ceremonies now took the place of University banners and sweatshirts. The tape cover of her first starring role took the place of a postcard, and a picture of her accepting an award was in place of pictures of Fez that she had tacked onto the wall for good measure.  
  
Waking over to her old bed, Rory sat down on the familiar quilt, and let the tears that had been precariously close to the surface fall down her cheeks. Hugging herself with her arms, she let the familiar embrace comfort her, the only embrace that she had allowed herself to have in years.  
  
She didn't know how long had passed when she was composed enough to sit back up from the fetal position that she had instinctually tucked herself into, and remove her boots. She unzipped the leather and set it beside the bed before she slowly stood and closed the door until it was only open an inch or so. Returning to the bed, she pulled off her leather gloves, and shrugged out of her warm jacket, setting it on the chest at the foot of the bed.  
  
Climbing under the covers, she closed her eyes, and sighed one last time. She was finally home.

* * *

I know, 2000plus words of absolutely no dialogue. But fear not! There will be conversation! I just wanted to give you some idea of the things that have gone on.  
  
So, I hoped that you liked it, and please, let me know what you think.  
  
Thanks for reading,

-Jayde


	3. Forever

**Chapter 2: Forever**

The feeling of being watched was an odd one, but one that she had gotten used to long ago. Waking, that feeling didn't automatically register. Rory shifted in bed, believing that the sounds around her were only remnants of a dream. A dream that she had become very familiar with, the dream that she was at home. The home that she had spent the better part of her life in, not the cold, almost sterile mansion that she referred to as 'home' in California, or the various places that she had houses in around the world.

Moving again, she frowned. Her feet could touch the baseboard, and she was sure that each hand could easily touch the edges of the mattress. That fact alone was odd, because she always made sure that she never slept in a bed smaller than a double.

As she shifted again, the fog of sleep receded, and the night before came rushing back to her like a freight train, and she had to forcibly stop herself from opening her eyes. Her sudden alertness must have shown on her face, because she heard a muffled sound come from beside her.

Slowly sucking in a breath through her nose, she tried to gather the courage to open her eyes and face what was hidden by the self imposed darkness. Finally, she turned her head slightly to the left, and blinked.

The sight that her eyes met almost broke her heart; her mother sat there, in the chair beside the bed, tears running freely down her cheeks, and arms locked around her up drawn knees. She just sat there, looking at her as if she was afraid to believe that she was real, as if the memory of her firstborn was just a complex figure of her imagination, and the person laying before her would disappear at any second.

Rory could feel her eyes fill with tears for the second time in less than ten hours, and she blinked rapidly. Biting her lip, she slowly sat up to face her mother fully, and smoothed down stray hair that had escaped the short braid that it had been placed in the night before.

She took a deep breath and looked her mother in the eyes, eyes that she had seen in a mirror every day. Not knowing what to do, she sat there and looked at the woman who had given her life. She still had the vivid blue eyes that she remembered, but there was a sadness there. As if she had been hurt, but was so used to pretending that she was impenetrable that the pain had been deeply buried.

Finally giving in to the uncomfortable silence, Rory spread her hands in an 'I don't know' gesture, and said the first thing that came to her mind, "I'm home, Mommy. I'm home."

At that, the dam seemed to break for both of them, and Lorelai threw herself at her daughter with a sob. And both crying, they clung to each other. A mother and daughter reunited. Two critical pieces to an intricate puzzle placed together. And two hearts once again beating as one.

**­­­­­­­­­­**

* * *

Several minutes later, a better composed Lorelai and Rory sat at the kitchen table, just looking at each other. Truthfully, Rory didn't know what to say to her mother, and after their emotional reunion she felt as if she had just awoken from a five year coma where everything had stayed the same, but at the same time had drastically changed.

It was early, only four or five hours after she had fallen asleep, but having gotten used to the abnormal hours of acting years before, she hardly noticed the weight of her limbs, and the fact that her eyelids wanted to droop down over her eyes. Looking at her mother again, she watched as Lorelai turned to stare at the coffee machine. A sight that had once been as familiar to her as the sight of her own face in a mirror. A sight that she had been unknowingly longing for for years.

The anticipation on her mothers face made her laugh quietly to herself, and caused Lorelai to look over to her. The look was searching, and without thinking, without wondering that what she read on her mothers face was wrong, she spoke, "Ask."

Lorelai blinked, startled. "What?"

"Ask." She repeated, "Ask whatever is going through your mind right now."

Lorelai sighed in response, inwardly smiling, "Why now?"

Rory shrugged, "Why not now?"

Her mother shot her a look, "Rory," she said warningly.

Looking away, Rory furrowed her brow, debating with herself. "It was just... the pressure there is horrible. I just finished filming my fourth film without a break, and I had a... I guess 'breakdown' is the most accurate term for it. I felt like I couldn't breathe when I was going home from a thing with the press, and I passed out in the back of my limo. David, my driver, he had to pull over and rub ice on my face so I would wake up. My doctor was called, and he said that I had to take some time off." She shrugged again, she didn't bother mentioning that her doctor had been warning her that if she continued to push herself like she had been, that a breakdown was inevitable. She was relatively lucky that it hadn't been worse, all things considered.

"I didn't really mind," She continued, "I had been wondering if I even wanted to continue working for a while, anyway. I mean, I never really intended to do what I did, fulltime acting. And I had gotten my invitation to the Chilton reunion, and I was remembering how it was," Sighing, she clasped her hands tightly together, "It was just a lot of things that made me come back. Come home."

Lorelai sniffed, "Well, I'm so happy that you're home, Baby." She stood, and walked around the table to Rory, kissing her lightly on her head, she hugged her around the shoulders. Straightening suddenly, she tilted her head, "Speaking of babies..."

Rory watched her mother walk out of the kitchen, and then sighed. Hearing a faint gurgling sound, she frowned, looking for its source. She spied the small baby monitor beside the coffee machine right before she heard her mother's voice flow through it,

"Hi, Honey. Good morning Brandon, I have a surprise for you, yes I do," There was more gurgling, "Do you remember me telling you about your big sister? Well you get to meet her today, Hun. 'Cause she's here, yes, she is..." Rory can hear her mother pause, and there is a rustling sound, and then a soft sniff. She closed her eyes, knowing that her mother had finally surrendered to the tears that had been threatening to fall free. After a moment, Lorelai continued talking, her voice choked, "Now, let's get you a nice new diaper and some clean clothes, would you like that? I think that you would, yes I do..."

Rory blinked back tears, and she hurriedly stood and went to switch off the monitor, not wanting to be eavesdropping when it was obvious that her mother had forgotten that she would be able to hear her. Taking a calming breath in, she turned and walked out the door, and onto the porch. Seeing the familiar side of Babette's house, she smiled and breathed in the crisp early morning air. Hugging herself, she tried to ward off the chill as she leaned on the porch rail and basked in the feeling of security, comfort. Things that she hadn't felt in what seemed like forever.

Hearing movement in the kitchen behind her, she turned just in time to see her mother strap in her gurgling little brother into a highchair. She grinned as she walked back into the house.

**­­­­­­**

**

* * *

**

She smiled genuinely for what felt like the first time in years. It wasn't the high beam that she gave to the press, and it wasn't the tight smile that she gave everybody else, but was a true, ear-to-ear, reaching-the-eyes grin that she had never actually bestowed on anyone since moving to California. She just sat there and smiled as she played with the miniature fingers of her little brother.

He had the same piercing blue eyes as herself, and her mother, a trait hat she knew would stay the same, even though most babies eyes changed color as they grew. His hair was a dark rich brown, just long enough to show a hint of curl as it brushed the tips of his ears. In the hand that wasn't busily examining the rings on her right hand, Brandon clutched a piece of toast that he was gnawing on with his single front tooth.

"Do you want anything to eat, Hun?"

Rory looked over to her mother who was mashing up a banana in a small bowl, "No, thanks. I never really eat in the morning."

Lorelai turned and looked at her daughter; she did look kind of thin. Thinner than what she had been, anyway. "Are you sure? I can actually cook now. Well, I can make good eggs. And a few other things. Luke made sure that he taught me when we first started going out. He said that it was so I wouldn't beg him for food every two seconds, but I still do. Always have, always will, I say."

Rory shook her head, "Not right now, but thanks. I've been on the 'Hollywood Diet'." She laughed softly, "I will get you to prove that to me, though. Last time that I saw you try and cook you were scraping the dried on fire extinguisher stuff off the pan for days."

"Well, I've improved. Considerably."

"I'm sure the pots and pans are thankful for that. So, speaking of Luke... does he know that I'm here?"

Her mother shook her head as she sat at the table, "No, he had to open the diner, and I 'forgot' to turn on the alarm for him." She replied with a grin, "So he practically had to run straight from bed to the diner so he could open the doors on time."

"So, how is he? How is everybody?"

"Luke's great, and of course, I'm not biased at all. After Taylor Closed the Soda Shoppe, he expanded the diner, and it's busier than ever. Patty just divorced husband number ten, I think it is. He was also husband number four and seven. Charles is a very persistent man. Uhhh, Kirk and Lulu are still together, married now, and still living in his mother's house, with a baby on the way. His mother moved to a retirement community in Hartford a while ago, just in case you were wondering."

Rory laughed, "Kirk? As a father?"

Lorelai nodded, smiling. "I know, he keeps coming to the Inn and the diner asking these insane questions about raising children. The other day, he asked me for the amount of calcium in breast milk! Why would I know that? When I had you, the only calcium that I paid any mind to was in the cheese of my grilled cheese sandwiches that I ate habitually. And with Brandon, I had Luke to worry about all that stuff." She paused to top up her and Rory's coffees,

"Where was I? Right, Taylor, well, he took a bad fall a year or so ago, and broke a hip. So now he's terrorizing the town from his remote-control wheelchair."

"Ahh, Taylor on wheels. Terrifying."

"Mmhmm, he made Luke build a ramp over the stairs to the diner. Threatened to sue for discrimination if he didn't."

Rory smiled, "Sounds like Taylor." She took her coffee cup in both hands, and stared into the dark depths of the scalding brew, "And..." She trailed off as Lorelai nodded sympathetically.

"He's good, Ror. Still teaching at SHH, one of the best teachers there, all of his students love him. He still helps out at the diner sometimes if it gets really busy, or someone can't make it on short notice. I think he has fun when he does." She smiles, thinking of the boy that she had once despised, and of the man that he had become. A man that she thought of more like a son than a nephew-in-law. "He's also sent a few kids over to work at the Inn or the diner if he knows that they need the cash. That's actually how I got three of my best employees at the Inn, and some alternate servers for events. And it's how Luke got his other cook that works with him since Caesar left to take care of his mother a year or so ago."

"Is she okay?"

"Well, she has Alzheimer's and he decided that it would be best if he moved closer to be with her."

As she had been speaking, she had been systematically scooping some of the mashed banana and feeding it to Brandon, who this time instead of taking it into his mouth, wrapped his chubby fingers around the spoon and tried to guide it to his mouth on his own, the results showing very clearly on his left cheek. Giving a squeal, he tried again and was rewarded with another, albeit smaller, spoonful of fruit.

Rory smiled at him as Lorelai placed the half full bowl of mash in front of him.

"He's adorable, Mom."

She nodded, "he looks just like you did when you were a baby."

Shifting uncomfortably under her mothers gaze, she rubbed her hands against her legs.

"Are you cold? Where are the rest of your things?" Lorelai looked at her daughter in concern.

"Uhh," Rory waved her hand vaguely behind her, "I left the rest of my things in the trunk of the car; I wanted to make sure that I could stay here before I brought my things in. I'll grab them, then?"

"Of course. Did you really think that we wouldn't want you here?"

Rory stood, shrugging, "I never really know what to think anymore, mom."

* * *

A few hours later, Rory walked alone in the almost deserted town. It was almost lunch, and she remembered that this had always been one of her favorite times of day. When almost everybody was securely nestled in their homes, in school, or in the diner, she would venture out and just wander through the small roads that wound through every part of town, the park, and the small forest that had grown beyond the old Independence Inn.

Letting an old instinct guide her she walked, taking in all of the changes that she hadn't seen in the dark night as she drove through the small hamlet for the first time in years.

The wooded area that she had explored as a girl had been cut down, for safety reasons, she supposed. Really, it had surprised her that it hadn't been done when one of the Banyon boys had climbed a tree, only to have the limb that he was standing on break from wood rot, resulting in a broken leg, fractured arm, and a severe concussion.

As she walked more, she noticed the smaller details of the town; the old Wilson house that had stood empty and abandoned for as long as she could remember, had been restored, and had flowers in the flowerbed, a swing of the porch, and dark blue curtains in the windows. When she looked up the street, she could see the side of Miss Patty's, now a vibrant green.

Still letting her feet guide her, she didn't really notice that she was walking towards the high school, and the place.

Their place.

Stopping abruptly as she saw the bridge, she looked behind her, as if expecting to be admonished for going to such a public place.

Taking a deep breath, she forced her frozen limbs to continue onward. Stopping at the middle of the bridge, she hesitated an instant before folding her legs, and sitting down. The cold wood felt smooth beneath her fingers, and she instinctively ran her hand along the edge of the bridge, feeling for a small juvenile carving of a heart. Smiling sadly, she recalled the day that she and Jess had carved it, not wanting to be so cliché, they both refused to put their initials in it. Fingering the now smooth wood, she frowned as she felt the unfamiliar ridges of lettering.

She shifted, so she was flat on her stomach, the half frozen wood cooling the leather jacket that was her only real protection from the frigid air.

Pushing her now tangled shoulder length hair behind her ears, she tilted her head over the edge. She gave a fleeting thought to what the people in Hollywood would think if they saw her now. Smiling wryly, she focused on the lettering, and then felt her mouth drop open – a great feat for somebody who was upside-downin shock. For in the once empty heart that she and Jess had jokingly carved was one word;

'**Forever**'

* * *

I'd like to take this time now to thank every single one of you whose read this, and I hope you enjoyed. A huge thanks to everyone who reviewed, I love you all.

Please, tell me what you think so far, I'd love to know. :D

Jayde.


	4. Rory ‘Lorelai Leigh’ Gilmore

I'm sorry that it took so long for me to update. I have no excuse.

Anyway, thanks go to **Ari** for stepping up in my time of need (I'm not melodramatic at all, am i?) being a wonderful beta for me, and to everyone else that have supported me in writing this. I love all of you!

Jayde

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* * *

**Chapter 3: Rory 'Lorelai Leigh' Gilmore**

Walking in a half-aware daze through the town, Rory mechanically tread towards the diner where she knew that her mother was waiting for her. Taking a pull on the cigarette that she had only been half aware of lighting, she frowned.

One word. It was only one word. A word that she had said, written, and read countless times, and never really thought that much about. Did that one word have so much power that she never paid any mind to? It must, since she was running it through her mind a million times a minute.

Jess had always said that they were forever, hadn't he? A forever that didn't even make it to the six-year mark. Angrily blowing out the acrid smoke, she berated herself -not for the first time- for leaving him. For giving up.

She wasn't sure what the word meant for her, though. What Jess had meant it to mean. Had he added it before she had left, when they were still happy and in love, and just never told her? Or after, after she gave up on him, and in turn, them.

She stopped short, as a thought struck her; perhaps he hadn't even written it. In all probability, he had never added it himself, but another couple, blissfully in love and unaware of the worlds' harsh realities, had seen a roughly hewn, empty heart, and claimed it as their own.

She wondered why she felt a pang of sadness with that thought. After all, she concluded mentally, that stage of her life was over, and had been for years. Never again would she think that love conquered all, that people who were 'in love' were invincible. Those were the thoughts of a naïve twenty-something, and although she was still in her twenties, she had become much more jaded, and cynical. Seeing so much hate and sacrifice had pushed her out of the fantasy that had been her life, and into the real world.

She sighed as she took one last drag of her cigarette, and then idly flicked it onto the curb. She allowed herself a small smile as she saw the familiar diner, but before she could walk up to the steps, or rather, ramp, she hard an unfamiliar mechanical buzzing, and then a not so unfamiliar voice bark up at her from behind.

"Young lady! Young Lady! Do you not see the clearly posted signs that read 'no littering'! And if I saw correctly, you just littered! You tossed that filthy cigarette butt right onto the street! Now, since you're new around here, I'll only give you a warning! But next time it'll be a fine! Do you hear me? Fifteen Dollars!"

Rory shook her head, and rolled her eyes. "Don't do me any favors, Taylor." She turned to face him, ignoring the look of shocked recognition on his face, "And grow up. A piece of trash won't end the world." She stuck a hand in her pocket, and grabbed the first bill that came into her hand, which happened to be a twenty. Dropping it on the stunned mans' lap, she shook her head mockingly, "Keep the change."

Silence reigned as she turned from him and walked towards the diner. She opened the diner door, and heard a familiar chuckle, then a sound of muted applause from outside. Looking behind her, she saw some of the high school students had braved the cold weather to be outside for their lunch period, and therefore had witnessed her little altercation with Taylor. She could barely hear the kids' excited chatter, but what she did pick up was the fact that her appearance in Stars Hollow would be the main topic of the rumor mill for days to come.

Looking back at her still chuckling stepfather, she smiled, feeling oddly shy.

In an uncharacteristic movement for the once gruff Diner owner, he opened his arms and walked forward to take Rory into his arms. "Hello, Rory."

She stiffened slightly before she let herself relax and wrap her arms around him in return, "Hey, Luke." She closed her eyes and let herself get lost in the moment, the unfamiliar feeling of security washing over her. As Luke gave her one last squeeze and pulled away, she could see him examining her critically.

"You're too thin." He said flatly.

Rory grimaced, "You can never be too thin, Luke. Or too rich," she added as an afterthought.

He only grunted in return and turned towards the kitchen, "One 'Double L' Special. Pronto."

As Luke tuned from her, she took a look around her, one thing fairly obvious in her mind, "Hey, Luke? Where is everybody?" she asked as she walked over to the counter and sat on one of the raised stools.

"Well, when your mom called here, she said that she'd be late for lunch because of something happening at the Inn, she told me that you were going to be here, and she thought that you really wouldn't want all the questions that would come with the crowd. So, I kicked everyone out of the diner, in hopes that your arrival wouldn't be in the gossip mill for at least another few hours."

He shook his head as he turned with a fresh cup of coffee in his hand, "I guess it was all for nothing, since that scene with Taylor. I congratulate you for that, by the way. I don't think that I've seen him that shocked since he learned that Hank in Woodbury decided to open what could be described as a clone of the old 'Soda Shoppe'." He placed the steaming cup of coffee in front of her and motioned for her to drink, "You must be freezing in that getup. Don't you have any proper winter clothes?"

Rory smiled gratefully, and wrapped her hands around the warm cup, blowing on the contents softly. Once she figured that it was cool enough – or rather, when she couldn't stand smelling the once familiar brew and not tasting it, she took a sip. Shrugging, she let her eyes meet Luke's for a moment, "I've been living in California for the past few years; winter clothing is an almost non-existent concept there." Taking another sip, she sighed, "I think this is even better than I remembered. Thanks."

Luke shrugged, "It's no problem."

Rory nodded, and didn't say anything.

He nodded in return, silent.

She took another sip of the coffee.

He crossed his arms, and leaned back against the back counter.

They both spoke at the same time;

"So—"

"Did you and—"

They stopped, and looked at each other, silent again. Just then, a loud 'ding' broke the silence, and Rory visibly jumped. Luke turned, and took a plate from the counter that led to the kitchen, and then placed it on the table in front of Rory.

She looked down at the plate in front of her, and frowned. "What is this?"

"It's uhhh," He ran his hand over his face, "It's the Double L special."

"'Double L?'" she queried.

"It was your mothers idea. 'The Double L'. Lorelai Leigh. It's sausage wrapped in a pancake tied together with bacon." He turned from her and busied himself with the coffee maker.

Rory looked down at her plate again, a small smile forming at the corner of her mouth. "You put my Yale Special on the menu?"

"Your mother put your Yale special on the menu. I had nothing to do with it." he denied, still not turning around.

"Okay." Rory smiled; she could see his ears had grown red from embarrassment.

"So, what were you going to say earlier?" Luke finally turned around, his scruffy face still flushed.

Rory blinked innocently, "Earlier?"

"Right before your food was ready. You started to say something."

"Oh, it was nothing. Just... how are you?"

Luke nodded, knowing that wasn't it, but playing along, "I'm good. Business is great, life is good."

"I saw a few family photos in the living room earlier; you look happy in them."

"Yeah? Well, I am." Luke looked at her untouched plate, "Eat."

"I'm not really that hungry right now," Rory started,

Cutting her off mid-sentence, he gestured towards her almost empty coffee cup, "Eat, or I won't give you any more coffee."

She narrowed her eyes at him, and wrinkled her nose, "Playing dirty, huh?"

"I learned from the best."

Rory was just finishing her lunch, and nursing her fifth cup of coffee, when the door jingled open, and Lorelai walked in, pushing Brandon in front of her in his stroller.

"Hey hunnies! I'll be right back; I'm just putting Brand upstairs." She unclipped the sleeping infant, and made her way upstairs, stopping briefly to kiss each Rory and Luke on the forehead and mouth respectively.

Rory frowned as her mother went upstairs, and looked at Luke quizzically.

"There's a crib set up in the old apartment, so when he falls asleep in the diner he can be put up there." He motioned to a smalltwo way monitor that was sitting on one of the diners' shelves. There was a crackling noise, and then;

"Testing, testing, Luke? Ror? Can you two hear me?"

"Yes, we can hear you, Lor."

"Okay, I'll be down in a minute."

"Luke?"

Rory turned her head at the unfamiliar voice, and saw a young man stick his head through the door to the kitchen. He couldn't have been any older than twenty, and when he looked around the almost empty diner, and then focused on her, she could see the flash of recognition in his eyes, and then embarrassment flood his features.

"Uhh... I..."

Luke, oblivious to any discomfort that his employee was feeling, smiled and made introductions,

"Jon, this is Rory, Lorelai's daughter, and Ror, this is Jonathan Cameron, he's my cook."

"Hi." Rory stood and held her hand out to him, smiling.

Jon looked at her hand like he'd never seen one before, and then slowly held his hand out to her. "Uhh, h-hello." he said, dazed.

"Was there something that you needed, Jon?" Luke spoke, startling the younger boy out of his shock.

"I uhh, I was just... that is... uhhh, I'm just going to leave. Since there's nobody here, and all I was doing back there was some stuff for my classes. Will you be opening later? Should I come back?"

"Yeah, go on and leave, I'll be opening again in an hour or so, but I won't really need you until around the dinner rush, so could you come back around five?"

"Sure, boss. That's no problem; I'll just be going now." He turned to Rory, "Uh, g-goodbye Miss Gilm...Miss Leigh."

Rory smiled at the boy's nervousness, "Call me Rory."

"Okay." Jon quickly turned, and walked back into the kitchen.

Luke and Rory could hear the back door open and close, and Rory shrugged, used to people acting odd around her. Luke however, was staring bemusedly at the place where his young cook had stood only a moment before.

"I don't know what got into him. He usually doesn't talk all that much."

"He was star struck, Babe." Lorelai said as she entered the main diner, "Or did you forget that Rory here is one of Hollywood's elite?"

Luke shrugged, "She's just Rory."

"To you and me, yes." Lorelai walked behind the counter and got herself some coffee, "To the rest of the people, she's this celebrity, who you don't really expect to see in your hometown."

"But it's Rory. Everybody knows that she's from here."

"Ah, my poor naïve Luke," Lorelai patted his cheek, "Knowing something, and _knowing_ something are two very different things. Now go be useful and make me a cheeseburger." She shooed him into the kitchen, and then turned to her daughter, who had been looking on in amusement. "Coffee?" She asked cheerily, picking up the pot again.

"Fill 'er up."

* * *

"Did you see that?"

"Do you think that it was it really her?"

"Well, this is listed as her hometown on her website. I checked when I came back in."

"She told Taylor off!"

"I know, did you see his face!"

"He turned purple! And he was speechless! It was so cool!"

"What are you girls talking about?"

"You don't _know!_"

"Know what?"

"Lorelai Leigh is here!"

Jess Mariano looked up sharply from grading the tests in front of him, and looked over at the gaggle of excited students in the back corner of his classroom. He looked back down, and tried hard to look uninterested in what they were saying, while at the same time trying to catch every word.

"_Here_? In Stars Hollow, here!"

"Yeah! And she told Taylor off in the middle of the town! I thought the old buzzard would have a coronary right there in front of the diner!"

"Are you sure that it was really her?"

"Of course! Here, I printed this out in the Library, it said right here that her hometown is Stars Hollow Connecticut, and that her real name is Lorelai Leigh _Gilmore_! The lady who owns the inn's last name is Gilmore-Danes! And remember, she has a daughter... what did she go by?"

"Rory. That was her name. My sister's best friend Clara, her brother used to go out with her."

"Cool."

Jess smiled and shook his head, tuning out the chattering. _So, Rory Gilmore is back in town. God help us all._

* * *

Thanks for reading. I'd love to know what you thought.

J.


	5. Haunting Memories

Hey, I know that it's been a long time since I updated, and I feel horrible about it. But I finally sat down and told myself to write... and what came out wasn't _complete_ crap. I'm so excited; I'm now hoping that my writers block is gone.

Anyway, I have to send an unbelievably _huge_ thank you to my two stand in betas **Kirsten** and **Kellie**. You two absolutely rock!

Now, since I wrote this while I had writers block, it isn't the best, but I think that it's pretty good.

I hope you enjoy.

Jayde

* * *

**Chapter 4: Haunting Memories**

"So, how long do you think you can stall the vultures?"

"Lorelai, honey, the press are already beating down my door wanting to know where you've run off to."

"Well, I hope that you can do your job properly, and keep them away from Stars Hollow. I won't be very pleased with you if I suddenly have twenty reporters camped out on my front lawn." Rory smiled as she stood in front of the busy diner, cell phone in one hand, cigarette in the other.

"Honey, you know that I can only do so much. But, if you really want a cover, what do you think of rehab?"

She shook her head. "Rehab? You really think that me being in rehab is the best cover story? You know what? Why don't you just say that I've been shipped off to the fat farm while you're at it? God, Stella, why don't you just say that I'm on an impromptu vacation, or something?"

"That could work." Her publicist's laughing voice came through clearly.

"I think I'm just going to fire you one of these days and get a real publicist. One who _won't_ try to drag my name through the mud at every turn."

"You know you love me."

"Ah, sadly, I do. I'll talk to you soon, and give you a nice update. I'll let you know if I should be bitten by a shark or something."

"So you want to be somewhere by an ocean. Check."

"I'll talk to you soon, Stel. Kisses." Rory laughed as she closed her phone and turned around. She frowned slightly as she looked in the window of the diner, where the customers were suddenly turning away from the window. Shaking her head, she rolled her eyes, and took one last drag from her almost full cigarette before making a show of stubbing it out and then throwing it into the trash can at the side of the road. She smiled brightly at the glaring Taylor as he buzzed by on his electric wheelchair.

Walking in to the suddenly active diner, she headed over to an empty stool at the end of the counter. Looking around, she spotted Luke in the far corner of the diner, where he was mopping up the floor from an apparent spill.

Frowning, Rory stood there and weighed her options. With a grin, she walked behind the counter, and grabbed herself a large mug. She put it down at her seat, and then headed over to the coffee pots. She took one pot in each hand, and sniffed at the brew in each. Screwing up her face as she pulled away from the first pot, she put it back (with a muttering of the hateful word, 'decaf') and then sighed as she inhaled the aroma of the second pot.

After filling her mug, she turned a smile on the watching customers. "Refill?"

There was a clamor to finish the last remains of coffee, then the holding out of newly empty mugs. Laughing under her breath, Rory started to serve.

* * *

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­ 

"So, what do I hear about you being a barmaid?" Lorelai asked later that day, as she and Rory walked through the Dragonfly.

"Come on, Mom. It wasn't that big of a deal."

"Ha! Not ten minutes after you started serving coffee, I got a call from Miss Patty who was just so excited about you helping Luke out because he was so busy. About how you were serving the customers, and how you were taking orders—"

"I was _not!_ I served a few cups of coffee, and then Luke banished me from behind the counter."

"And _why_ exactly were you behind the counter in the first place?" Lorelai grinned as she walked through the lobby to the main desk, scanning the room for anything amiss.

"I needed coffee. Luke was busy, so I got it myself."

"Ah, you are so a mommy's girl."

Though it was said in an offhand manner, Rory still felt a pang of guilt. She knew that even if her mother didn't say it – no, _because_ her mother didn't say it, Rory's absence from her life had hurt. And she was just now realizing how much her absence in her mother's life had hurt her as well. With a forced smile, Rory spoke, "Yep, a mommy's girl; that's me."

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* * *

Rory sighed and swirled the wine around her glass as she looked at the busy dining room of the Dragonfly Inn. No one had really seen her yet; they'd noticed that she was there, but no one had realized who she was. She was trying to keep it that way. The last thing that she needed was a tourist calling the closest news station.

After watching the bustling activity for another minute, she turned and headed back into the _almost _controlled chaos of the Inn's kitchen, smiling as she saw the still overenthusiastic Sookie calling out orders, and the rest of the staff trying to clean up after her. The faint familiarity of the scene made her want to cry, knowing that she didn't know how to act around everyone who used to be like family to her. Hell, she didn't really know how to act around people who _were_ family to her.

Taking a deep breath, she smiled as she walked over to Sookie, pausing to set her wineglass with the rest of the china waiting to be washed. "Hey, Sookie. I'm gonna get out of here."

"Okay, Hon. _Danny! _Take the onions off the stove!" Turning back to Rory, the older woman smiled. "Don't be a stranger. You know what? I'm throwing you a party. A '_Welcome Home, Rory!_' party, what do you think of that?"

"Well, I was just trying to stay under the radar—"

"Honey, _that_ plan went out the window with you telling off Taylor. I heard about it not five minutes after it happened, so I'm sure that there isn't a soul in Stars Hollow who doesn't know that you're back in town."

Shaking her head, Rory grinned ruefully. "Hollywood gossip rags have nothing on the Stars Hollow rumor mill. I'd forgotten about it, actually."

"Well, it hasn't forgotten about you. I swear, you're mentioned at least once a week in it. You getting a new role; you getting a new boyfriend; you losing a new role to your new boyfriend's new girlfriend."

"Well, I've lived quite an exciting life that I didn't know about."

"I guess you have. About the party... did you develop a taste for escargot while you were in Hollywood?"

"I've been known for forcing myself to choke one or two down for propriety's sake. Could you keep the gathering... small, though, Sookie? I don't want too much attention drawn to the fact that I'm here. The last thing I need is a group of paparazzi camping out on Mom and Luke's front yard."

"Sure, small. I got it. It'll be so small that you'll have to get out a magnifying glass to find it. So, this Saturday night sound good? I'll even bring everything to Lorelai's; we can have the party there. Or no... We don't want to wake up Brandon. Well, I'll find somewhere to have it; don't you worry! I'm so glad to see you again!" And with that, Sookie gave Rory a quick hug, and then went back to calling out orders that had the kitchen staff racing to keep up with her.

Rory shook her head and walked to the door, stopping to grab her coat. Once outside, she stood on the porch that now circled the entire Inn, and sighed, watching her breath puff out and mist in the cold air. Idly taking out a cigarette and lighting it, she stood there for a few minutes, just looking at the sky. It was one thing that she couldn't do in LA. The smog and the bright city lights erased all but the brightest stars, and even those she could only see on a perfectly still night. It was a nice change to see the sky almost overflowing with bright, glistening stars. They cast a glow on the untouched snow, making it seem almost unnatural.

Shaking her head, she took one last drag from her cigarette and then put it out in one of the ashtrays that had been set out along the porch.

She found herself walking through the town again, not really paying attention to where she was walking. Again. Although she_ did_ make a conscious effort to avoid the bridge, she found herself wandering around almost everywhere else. She passed by the Diner, and debated with herself for a minute whether or not she should go in, but since she really didn't feel like reminiscing with the town about 'the old days', she walked on.

She passed Doose's Market, the gazebo, the dark bookstore, the post office, one of the many stores that sold ceramic unicorns, and still she walked. After passing Miss Patty's Dance Studio, and realizing that she was going in a circle, she stopped for a moment, looking across the street. Gypsy's. The gas station. Rory smiled slightly as she walked towards it, the memories of the place swamping her as she took out a cigarette and lit it, without giving much thought to her actions. She sighed wistfully as she recalled what was now the distant past.

"Those things can kill you, ya know."

She froze, thinking that her ears were playing tricks on her. That the familiarity of the place, and her memories were just coming back to haunt her. But hearing the crunch of snow under the feet of the person who came up behind her, she knew that it wasn't just her imagination. Bringing the cigarette back up to her lips, she took a slow, steadying drag, hoping that the acrid smoke filling her lungs would slow the beating of her heart, if only for a minute.

"I said that those things can kill you," Came the haunting voice again.

Without raising her head, she laughed slightly. "Not fast enough for my liking."

Rory said it quietly, but she knew that he heard her. But that 'Huh' that she was waiting for never came. After taking one last pull, she tossed the cigarette on the ground. Trying to steady herself, she exhaled slowly, and turned around, her gaze still lowered, as if looking up was the only thing between her and her past. Which really, it was. Finally mustering up enough courage, she slowly raised her face, and was confronted with the one thing that she had been both looking forward to and dreading since she made the trip back to Stars Hollow.

"Jess."

* * *

So?

I'm evil, aren't I?

J.


End file.
